Ahoy! Great long weekend ahead! Don't drink too much, don't gamble too much, don't drive drunk too much, don't eat too much and just enjoy the kampung air, the home cooked food, your momma's shining eyes when she sees you're not in prison, take in the MUST have double combo of ice cold beer and 'chi yok kon', wear red lingerie tomorrow night (for the ladies so that the God of Prosperity takes an extra look at you), shag like the Rabbit Year that it is, give me 'ang pows' (yes i have no shame!), call old friends, see old friends and try not to send old girl friends drunken text messages when you bump into them in that old neighborhood bar you dated 20 years ago.
All you Chinese people in Seremban and around Selangor, you tell your mums that I am coming visiting and i demand, pineapple tarts, chi yoke kon, ice cold beers and a nice fat red packet! My shame exists only in the far reaches of the nether dimensions, somewhere between an Alan Moore wet dream and the Forest of Smurfs so it inconsequential to your pitiful attempts to mind fuck me from seeking gifts this festive season. Feed me! Pay Me!
Oh, and Gong Hei Fatt Choy y'all!
* thanks to Langkau for the hilarious Imperial Happy Hour pic!