Wednesday, July 21, 2010

How NOT to prep for a Mountain...


Tracy, Maddy and Karen from KL. Two auditors and a corporate trainer drinking with us. Who woulda thunk it? That there in their hand is the infamous Bounty Bar Jungle Juice. Copious amounts of sugar masks the strong local whisky inside this very refreshing drink.

So I aim to take on the toughest volcano of my life and what are my preparations?

I hit Bali just after noon on the 16th (Friday). I head straight for the hotel bar where they offer me local vegetable 'keropok'. I order up an ice cold Bintang and ask hopefully if they have the ABC brand chili sauce. They do! And they park a whole bottle in front of me. THAT ends up my lunch. I go through 2 baskets of keropok and LOTS of chili. I head to my room to check in and catch up on some emails. Gus turns up at about 6 pm and we continue drinking at the bar.

One of those random travel moments happens when I realise that another group of Malaysian turn up which I vaguely know. They've done biz with us in the past and had also hit town at the same time. 3 women and a 'happy' man. See, you women don't want to follow me but the powers of the Universe send 3 to me (yeah, same my name, say it loud and proud ladies...)

The next thing I know we're heading out at about 9pm. We head to Macaroni for dinner then head across to the Sky Garden across the road. The beers are flowing. Drunk Australian women get on stage and start gyrating with nothing more than string bikinis and sarongs and Daisy Dukes. We are happy. I leave my fate to the rest. It would be rude to leave especially as we are heading to the notorious Bounty bar (the youngest crowd in Kuta - a lot underage). The bar is huge - gyrating half naked bodies perform on the stage and in a cage. The girls are in Wonderland. Never have they seen so many half naked surfers before. We hang a bit then head out to Deja Vu, a gay bar along the beach (I'll put down links to all these places later). The music here sucks the sweat off my balls. Its those heavy trancy shit that gay people seem to like. C'mon Gay People, whats wrong with a little Motown? I can't take it. It's about 3.30 am. I announce I'm heading back. We all pile into a cab and head back to the hotel. My head hits the pillow about 4.30am. I'm up by 8 (breakfast buffet ends at 10am and I aim to get my meal on the house). I head out to town to look for ABC Chili for my staff who have developed an addiction to the stuff (jangan marah Peekszzzz Yo! :)

I also have to find some underwear as in my rush to leave I left my sexy thongs back in KL. Gus had mentioned Klapa before in the past and I was curious that we needed to check it out. We pile in at about 5pm and head out to the South of Bali.



View from one of Klapa's balconies.

Klapa is a gorgeous F & B complex perched on a cliff. Its south of the Rock Bar and just after the Culture Park on the right. It has a 180 degree view of the Indian Ocean. Guests can head down the cliff and just bath in the sea and then make their way up when their throats get thirsty for a cold beverage.

It's breathtaking. It's almost a amalgation of Ku De Ta (dining) and Rock Bar (cliff side bar) but at least 3 times larger then the previous mentioned. We order up some wine and take in the sunset. The sky blazes gold as a DJ spins some Ibiza tracks.

The cold Autralian Breeze hits us as we down more wine (Australian Breeze - cold wind that hits Bali in July during the winter season in Australia. It tapers off towards the end of August. This is the best time in Bali! In the immortal words of Rick Flair, "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!". Oh and another thing it also brings the Great White Sharks from the Great Barrier Reef up to the Eastern waters of Bali near Sanur. Just thought I'd add that in in case some of you want to wrestle sharks before breakfast)


Sunset from Klapa.

We take leave of Klapa and then head down to Jimbaran for seafood. Beers are consumed. Shrimp, fish, oysters are consumed. I am now not in a good state of mind. We are supposed to start out climb at 1am. We only leave Jimbaran at about 9pm.

10pm Saturday the 17th of July, Gus and I board a van for the two hour drive that takes us to Bali's most sacred mountain.

I say a quiet prayer that the mountain has nothing against alchoholic climbers...

4 comments:

C. Andres Alderete said...

Could you tell the drunkest chick in the middle that I'm in love with her? Thanks.

Chindiana said...

Will do Carlos! I might be meeting up with that group again for drinks sometime next week :)

J said...

*JELEZ*
How come the Universe doesn't send over 3 cute guys and a "happy" girl when I am in need? *pout*

Chindiana said...

Well J, you've got to consistently reach a higher plane of consciousness. Normally after 3 jugs of beer and two bottle of whiskies.