Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Wrestling Bears Before Breakfast

OK this is just to set the record straight you perverts. This is especially to the FON and his grinning sidekick Bai The Wise and to the one or two of you who have brought it up over coffee or snarky sms-es.

When I say 'wrestling bears before breakfast' I DO NOT mean that I'm doing the palm tango with my morning boner, NOT spanking the Chindian Monkey, NOT wrestling with my 24" python or wasting tissue below my waist.

Fukers....

So here I shall explain to you in simple terms what it means to me.

As most of you know I'm a very morning person. With my schedules I normally start a day at 6-7am. Sometimes as early as 5 in the morn when all the world around me is dreaming sweet Dream King inspired dreams OR if you're a Ecstasy popping fuckhead student (yeah you that backed into my car and ran off) you're probably stoning yourself through a menu of pills at some other punk's apartment.

Even when I am not on a dawn flight to somewhere I usually am up and sipping my morning coffee by 7am (unless by some massive charity from the Gods of Fortune some woman has managed to keep.. nevermind).

SO, my day starts early. And what I find is that the more work I get done by 9am, I get on a high and this momentum gets me through lunch and up until about 3pm where the urge to hit a bar and get drunk whispers seductively through the slight haze of the banana leaf lunch.

SO - the BEARS are my work. My bane and my fortune. The challenges I face daily pays my salary, enables me to splurge on imported beer, buy that Premium Format Slave Leia from Singapore, gets me to dream that I can go on an exotic holiday to Bali if only some silly woman with a hot bikini body will be charitable enough to pander to my pathetic pleas. 

The more shit I can get done in the morning the better the rest of the day goes. 

SO - Wrestling Bears Before Breakfast is not an adventure between my left palm and 'Lil Chindy.

Terima kasih Dan Majulah Sukan Untuk Negara.

15 comments:

Jun-E said...

I was going to ask what the Premium Format Slave Leia from Singapore meant... and then I realized that you're into toys and it probably just means the Premium Format Slave Leia from Singapore. shedyva.

J said...

Erm. Thanks for the clarification?

*lol*

Ah Chongzzz said...

Love the sign-off ;) Reminds me of my gurubesar's letters and memos back in those days (and work too, these days...hah!!!)

Chindiana said...

Jun-E! Yes, it is the Premium Format Princess Leia from Singapore. Since you're there would it be possible for you to collect the Premium Format Ms Marvel for me when it arrives? Big package a bit bout 2 ft high. Can? can? Ratici!

J! Never let it be said that Chindiana Trails is not an educational site... :P

Ah Chongzzzz! Yea I AM a sentimental kinda grump. HEY CONGRATS ON THE ENGAGEMENT!!!!!! Why are you not on MSN! An FB greeting is NOT fun la and I'm too cheap to sms you some bland greeting.

ghoul said...

I always thought you meant wrestling with your blankie as you try to drag yourself out of bed :P

Ahhhhh.

word verification: spher

Chindiana said...

AH CHONGZZZ!! SORRY SORRY! I dont know why i keep mistaking you for Ah Chanzzz! Must stop reading in dark places...

Ghoul! Even IF it were my blankie it would be a ferocious hungry blankie with 3 foot claws and an unsatiable appetite.

AND look what we have here - word ver. pitedness...

Anonymous said...

aww cho chveet the post..dun worry baby foo. the fon chayangs...buy banana to feed the babee bear ok. hugz.... xxx FON

Jun-E said...

Sure no prob. When is it coming? I am going to Europe from 19/6 - 27/8, so it has to be before then, and you have to wait until I get back in Sept to get it, unless it arrives this weekend then I can go get it and bring it back for you next weekend. Just let me know =)

C. Andres Alderete said...

I recently found out that a "bear" is also another name for the opposite of flamboyantly gay men. They're big, tough, and hairy gay men. That's what I thought you meant by "wrestling bears before breakfast."

Chindiana said...

FON! you're losing it faster than I thought. Time to get a new job you scary creature.

Heya Jun-E, plenty of time. Only arrives in October or November! Thanks ya!

Carlos! DUDE! You just opened up a scary whole new can of worms!

Anonymous said...
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Jun-E said...

Oh then can lah. Just let me know the specifics nearer to the date.

Chindiana said...

Great! Cheers!

Nex said...

Oh I totally misunderstood too...

I thought since you're a manly man like me you ACTUALLY go out into the woods to work up a sweat by tackling a beast before b'fast...though I often wonder where do you find the woods around your area and what creature would be worthy of a manly man such as you, but I did not want to ask for fear of triggering your grumpiness...

Thanks for the explanation-that's one less dark question-mark filled cloud hanging over my head! :D

Chindiana said...

Glad you're clarified Nexo! And you are wise indeed to steer clear of the wrath of a irritable Chindian...