Sunday, February 28, 2010

First in A Series


Partially hidden tattoo of a Baby Ganesha deity.

Ladies and gents, start your engines to a whole new series on tattoos on babes. I've always found women being a bit more creative than men (c'mon you clowns, how many 'tribal' designs do you want? what tribe is that? what does it mean to you? sheesh....) with their 'tats and of course the female form embraces the ink much more comfortably then a dude's chunky being.

This is of course a bad shot. Only because the lady here Vety is a Thai hostess in a club in Singapore. We're not really supposed to take pictures in a club like this. This is not those dodgy clubs where they blow you off under the table as most of them speak excellent English and are there to just keep you company while you burn your way through the company expense account.

I'd like to think behind every tattoo there is a story. Well Vety's here is pretty much a standard that she got it as Ganesha is the God of Knowledge and resourcefullness. And she wanted that as it's tough going in Thailand. The tattoo is done the traditional way without needles and the fine Thai wording is intricate. I've never seen one of these before but of course I dont really see a lot of Thai women outside of work.

The story behind Vety is intresting. As the standard action in Singapore many girls are brought in strictly for vice or as hostesses to the country where they converge on Geyland, Orchard Towers and the other unofficial designated areas by the Singaporean authorities. Some just work out of clubs as hostesses and singers espcially the Thai women. Most of the Thais come in on monthly tourist visas and alternate between Bangkok and other South East Asian capital cities mainly Kuala Lumpur, Singapore and now even Jakarta. But I must assume Singapore gives them the best value for money with their high Singapore dollar.

In the Thai bars in Singapore the girls make their steady income from guys buying them Lady Drinks (some guys like to buy Lady Boy Drinks... ) but the main cash comes from singing. As in some of the smaller food courts in the smaller towns in Malaysia like Penang, Seremban and Melaka in Malaysia where we see old ladies singing on a stage and are rewarded by members of the audience with garlands of flowers bought at a premium average RM10-50. The money is then split between the venue owner and the singer.

In Singapore however this takes on the 'reward' platform to a whole new level. Here garlands range from S$100 to 20000!!!!. Some guys spend up to S$10,000 on a girl in one night! AND this is not even a promise of sex!!!!! I saw two dudes vieing for the attention of one girl and she had garlands on her that were about S$2,000. And this was just the first set on stage.

This is very new to me. I've been around the region but to see guys literally throwing THOUSANDS dollars in just one night with no sure of any action is amazing. More must be studied on this matter. Must visit these clubs for the sake of quenching the thirst for knowledge.

The girls probably earn more than you or me which blows. They pull in a minimum about SD300 a night. One day off a week. Roughly doing the math thats maybe about S$ 8K. Its about USD6.5K and over RM20K. Their housing is paid for wish means they only spend on food. Damn, what i would give for endless legs, silicone boobs, and tight ass, waist long hair, monthly menses, mood swings, insecurity, and...... . Never mind.

Saturday, February 27, 2010

Show Them To Me

Ahhh... sometimes its just great to share things. Thanks LCB.

C'mon ladies, show them to me...

Friday, February 26, 2010

What's In My Book Case - yeah it's a sloooooow public holiday



This is something I've always wanted - an almost ceiling high wall of books. Some for me to devour for personal satisfaction (Sandman and Watchmen and Alan Moore comics) and some to impress women (Shindler's List, Soul Mountain, some Danielle Steel). Two things though - In my current state of mind I find it incredibly tough to find books I like PLUS books just aren't that cheap with our weak currency.


Part of my graphic novel collection. Women get confused when they see this.


One of my fav figures, the comic character Dawn. Never read the book but just loved McFarlane's sculpt. Gorgeous for a 6"high figure.


Spawn in flight. And NO that's the stand and not a 18" boner between his legs...


TRYING to learn how to run a business - half these books remained unread.


McFarlane's Ice Dragon - love the detail!


The source of confusion for many people - Conan and Soul Mountain in a row...


Ahhh, Janis in all her wailing glory. Another McFarlane favourite of mine.


Many mistake this as my self indulgent tribute to grumpy, constipated personality. Siiigh to be misunderstood.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Manado No More

AirAsia has canceled their direct flights from Kuala Lumpur to Manado, in North Sulawesi, Indonesia. Woe is me and a massive waste especially to the many folks out there who have not had a chance to discover Manado's raw beauty beneath the oceans and the serene simplicity of its volcanic highlands and beautiful countryside.

Underneath the waves the sea off Manado is theming with wondrous sea life and is a makro undersea photographer's wet dream. The 'muck diving' experience is one of a kind with a vast array of little critters inhabiting the oceans especially along the Lembeh Strait.

Now the only way is to fly Silk Air from Singapore or via various connections with domestic airlines out of Jakarta and Makassar.

Below is just some tribute shots from my last trip. I've just added some pictures from Ariel who is a good friend and avid diver who has already dived Bunaken and the Lembeh Straits in Manado.


Dive Boat at Minahasa Lagoon's cafe.


Tomohon market place


The farmlands on the way up to Mahawu Volcano


The crater of active volcano of Gunung Lokon




Onong's Palace jungle getaway


Tandano Lake


Jesus lives! Just outside of Manado City.


View of Manado bay and town from Mahawu volcano


Deck Chairs from Minahasa lagoon resort





These are some pictures courtesy of Ariel Spock, taken from Bunaken and the Lembeh Straits.


For more on my posts of Manado Go HERE.


Saturday, February 20, 2010

Another Day Another Airport


I'm sitting here in the LCCT waiting to board my flight to Jakarta. Just thought I'd post a little on Bangkok. Bambii was a no show so I had to make my meeting solo. In a way it was probably for the best. I was told by my contact that she's hot so she might have distracted the old dudes at the meeting table and they would probably think she was just more than just a translator to me.


An otherwise pretty uneventful trip except that my cab driver was a self proclaimed 'Red Shirt' the pro Thaksin. It was interesting chat as I've never met any locals who are so vocal about their politics. He said the 'Yellow Shirts' the pro government are joined at the hip to Abhisit's ruling government and the army. The army in a way chooses who runs the country. He curtly cut me short when I asked if the King had any influence. Quite cool still to know that even politics cannot change the reverence all Thais have for their ruling monarch. The Yellow Shirts use violence he said, guns, bat, and sticks. The Red Shirts are non violence. He goes on to say that the government is in debt and that no action is being done to kick start the economy. Tourism is down and folks are heading to Malaysia, Hong Kong and Singapore instead of to the Land of Smiles.



Bangkok waves goodbye and mutters a "good riddance to bad grumpy Malaysians" as I walk towards immigration.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

3 Days 3 Countries

Tomorrow I head to Bangkok. Trouble shooting with some dodgy politics going on. Suspect the MD of vendor is lying to the Chairman or at least fudging the translation of conversations from English to Thai. The Chairman looks at least a century old and speaks no English. The MD is up to something. He's been out translator in meetings, emails and documents to the Chairman but negotiations seem patchy and erratic. I thought I caught him out when I asked him to ask the Chairman why all our emails and faxes to meet urgently last month were not answered and that it made no sense that they said we were not cooperating. MD laughs, speaks to Chairman in light smiley tones and Chairman laughs.

Fuker.

I've arranged for an independent translator tomorrow. But I'm worried.

Her name is Bambii.

On Saturday I head to Singapore for another day trip. Two meetings which I hope to finish in time to visit Simply Toys and see if I can get a Premium Format Slave Leia on sale (after the meeting of course)

Sunday is Jakarta's turn and I get to spend a night near Kelapa Gading mall. I get a chance to buy that McFarlane Warrior Dragon I did not have space to carry back on the last trip. In the words of Little Ani, "Yipeeeee..."

Yeah I know -_-

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR FOLKS! UPDATED



UPDATED - 12.08AM, 17th February 2010.
Its funny when you're living two cultures and claim neither as your own because of a lack of religious discipline. I've realized I severely lack An Idiots Guide to Chinese and Indian customs.

BUT oh there is a great amount of discovery and experimentation to be done!

So, the eve of the year of the Tiger starts with me trying to concentrate on my food at my Aunty's dinner table. It's the traditional Chinese steamboat. I'm the only one who is not chattering and laughing in Cantonese for the obvious reasons stated below. I concentrate on the food and look busy picking the tofu and pork from the steam boat pot. I make small talk to my cousins on my dad's side who do not speak English. They are probably catching on that every year i take a great interest in the hot and dry weather around every Chinese New Year, their health, work and how far do they commute to work every day. (I've GOT to start learning new lines man...)

I make a quick excuse half way through saying that I have to go back home for my own family's reunion dinner. Lots a laughter and baskets and plastic bags of food are passed to me to share wit the family at home.

When I get back it feels good to be in the middle of a mini United nations of a family - my sister has deviated from traditional Chinese dishes and has whipped up a pasta, chicken rendang, mixed vegetable salad, fried chicken and water melon punch. My stomach is protesting already from the earlier meal but strangely excited at its new 'victims' sitting still warm on the loaded table.

The start of the year of the Tiger involves going back to the Chinese New Village that was my home for the first 5 years of my life. We pray, eat, cam whore and laugh with the neighbors. fire crackers go off in the the distance and a cool wind blows through the village on the hill. An Indian meter reader from the Electricity Board hits the mother lode as old ladies give him a token 'ang pow' of varying amounts for turning up on an auspicious day. With at least 400 homes in the village he could make an extra RM100 bucks for his day out excluding the triple pay for working on a public holiday. Good job 'anei'.

I learn customs long forgotten. I remember to ask every person older than me in a room to eat first before i start. I learn not to put my chopsticks on the bowl before the meal starts, I lose 30 bucks gambling, i remember that I've been referring to Long Yok (dried red meat) wrongly as Siew Yok Kon - no wonder I've been getting strange looks for the past 20 years when i mention that I love Siew Yok Kon (pork floss) with beer. The list goes on. The new year is revered and most of my Chinese friends have taken anywhere from a week to 10 days off from work. We should all have a week off to celebrate our religions and culture. What's wrong with ten days of boozing, gambling and eating?

Original Post - 1.38PM, 13th February 2010

So tomorrow begins the Year of The Tiger. A tough year for most of us I'm told. But tomorrow most of us will be caught up with visiting family and friends and stuffing our faces with all sorts of grub. Oh and the gambling games begin too.

I just got off the phone with my Aunty. In the uncomfortable exchange in Cantonese (She fluently and me mimicking Rain Man) I THINK i just committed to TWO reunion dinners tonight!

I have my family's dinner at 7pm and I think I committed to my aunt's house as well at 6.30pm. In my hopeless attempt to understand my aunts quick request over the phone i THOUGHT she said she was coming over to our home. Only after double checking with my sister did I just find out that I am literally fucked.

I will now go to my aunts house where EVERYONE SPEAKS CANTONESE! My proficiency in the language is that of a 6 year old Martian. This is NOT going to be a happy meal. Think i will arrive with a few beers in my belly beforehand.

I've just realized that being somewhat blase about both the customs of both the religions that I was brought up with I'm probably considered a sinner on both sides of the fence. I can't say I have not touched beef (banned from Hindu Heaven) nor can I say I've followed the Chinese customs anywhere close either - dont pray and and even don't wear new clothes for the New Year. (I have for this year though - I need all the celestial help possible!).

Wonder if there is a place somewhere for grumpy people who wrestle bears before breakfast?

Kong Hei Fatt Choy people!

Thursday, February 11, 2010

The Wolfman


You would even consider because of Del Toro and Hopkins. Weaving just turns up to channel his inner Agent Smith minus the suit and Raybans.

Bottom line - FUUUUUUUUUUCKIIIIIIIIING SLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWW Movie!

The grey English moors and the derelict old sets only gives this movie the exciting pace of an old folks home. The werewolf is retro and how many more werewolf transformations can one take seriously? Hopkins scenes are entertaining and Hugo Weaving is passable with somewhat cliched situations. Old Benicio looks like someone dragged his ass out of bed after a week long bender.

I assume they were going for Bela Lugosi 'classy' but in the end it just ends up a plodding piece of dreary druggery.

Save your money. Invest in your soul's satisfaction with two Ramly burgers and a ice cold glass of tebu.

Random

Seen this morning on Bart's MSN status:



Jewbacca- The Israelite Wookie says:

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Half A Day In Saigon

Saigon, Ho Chi Minh, what do you call it? This was another one of those trips where I'm in and out of a country within 6 hours. 

You know you've got a problem with conversion of currency when you change USD50 dollars and get back 872,000 Dong. 872,000!!! WTF! Where does one even begin to start to figure out how much I'm paying in RM when paying for a bottle of mineral water which seems to cost the sum total of a bungalow in SS2.

Bottom line?

1. The traffic sucks

2. It SEEMS cleaner than Hanoi up North.

3. Communication with locals is easier than with drunk Ewoks on crack.

4. Things are fucking expensive. It's almost all in US Dollars. A croissant sandwich and a small coffee cost me USD10 at the Tan Son Nhat International Airport. That's RM35 maaaann!!!!! I'm sorry but its the most expensive sadwich I've EVER had in an airport. I would probably pay about RM15 for the same thing at the LCCT and the second (now) most expensive would be in Changi in Singapore where it would cost about RM24-26. 

5. Its easier to get a Megan Fox hand job then a cab (that is not occupied) in downtown Ho Chi Minh.

Below are some random moments.


The New York steak house - great place for client schmoozing. Food is passable.

As I spend 2 of the 4 hours stuck in a cab here are some random pictures taken from my window:











REALLY BORED AT TAN SON NHAT INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT






Yeah you know one is bored when one starts taking pictures of innocent chairs in an airport...

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Death Star Toilet Art


For more fun GO TO www.thechive.com

*Thanks to LCB for the heads up!

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Lose the Flu Fight

I feel fucked.

EXHAUSTED.

Like two sex starved dinosaurs had used me as a bed to make wild dinosaur love.

or

A steam roller used me as a carpet. Repeatedly. Until the steel and metal motherfuker ran out of diesel.

or

Like that stupid coyote from the end of every Road Runner cartoon.

I am so weak, a two day old peanut could sneak up on me and assault me without me putting up much of a fight.

This shows that never, NEVER try to run off a flu AFTER you've hit your peak. Let alone two hours STRAIGHT on a futsal court. But then half my grey matter must already be in that wonderful shiny brain in the sky by now, with the copious amounts of booze i've chugged down over the years.

This is a first for me. The fever is gone. That's good. But. I. FEEL. SHATTERED.

I sometimes think my brains are more suited for a door stopper. Or those decorative things hanging on hand phones.

Most people would go home and take some aspirin for a fever. But NO. I HAVE to macho work it out running up and down a court being body checked by some other folks.

Well, it only makes sense doesn't it? I mean after all I DO wrestle bears before breakfast.

What do you expect?

Yeah, i AM an idiot...