Friday, October 16, 2009

The Nectar of The Gods - Ice Cold Heineken

I've been walking like a geriatric penguin since Monday. The back spasms had not receded. Interestingly I managed to put in a pull battery to tests in an attempt to ease the annoying and sometimes painful jab of pain whenever my back was mis-aligned during the rigours of my day to day romps.

Monday - I try to run about a futsal court to ease the pain. Seems fine during the game but pain comes back with a vengence Tuesday morning.

Tuesday morning - I realize its probably a combo of mental stress, physical stress from lugging a heavy back pack over the weekend excursions to Singapore and Jakarta, sever lack of sleep - 3-4 hours a day for the past 2 weeks, late nights and my birthday drinking binge. All this syndromes camped up on my already badly abused lower back.

So - I hit my old faithful the Chinese acu pressure dude - who proceeds to grind away at my 'chi' points. Funny thing 'chi'. It BLOODY MOVES about your body. The pain on the wing and top half of my back eased up quite well BUT when i stood up I had this weird sensation rushing down into my groin area and my legs. As i half collapsed to the ground all I could remember was growling 'whatthefuk wei!!!" Acupressure Dude excitedly said it was the chi moving out from the sore points. He had another round of massaging the points and told me to go home and drink lots of water.

Fail - now i had legs of rubber. Walking like a drunk duck, with my ass sticking out miserablly behind me as i was too stiff to stand up straight.

I figured I'd just go home early and rest - hand phone off and no checking email. I pull out Season One of Reaper, bought some crisps and drinks and camped out on the sofa the entire evning and slept at 10pm. - no bloody help.

Wednesday - pain now only concentrated at lower back and left wing muscles. Legs back in working order. Today was a trying day I had an event in the evening and more work in the morning. Could not take a break.

I arrive at the event at about 6.30pm. They have set up the best VIP hospitality suite. I manage to refrain from drinking anything. By the halfway mark I have to conduct a meeting so hold court in the VIP suite. Of course one does not let his guest drink alone. I call up a Heineken. Meeting quickly finishes. Old friend turns up - Heineken 2. My staff is stressed so buy her a cold beverage and order up Heiny 3. I start running about to sort somethings out with a bottle in hand. And. The. Pain. Is. Gone.

No more.

Just a little twinge but otherwise all good.


So what is this you ask in disbelief? Well, its called Happy Hour for a reason innit? Happy is the best muscle relaxant in the world. And the mental pysche plays a HUGE part in what your brain says to your body.

So if you booze addled brain is humming "Sweet Home Alabama" in a dangdut beat, the rest of your body is going to be a happy camper too.

Anyway the pain is almost gone. The x-rays show no bone drama although I think I will need an MRI soon. Just no time this week.

So. Strongly recommended in times of trouble, forget looking into the skies for a man in blue spandex or calling your girl friend's rich dad - head down to the closest bar and order up an ice cold friend (with crispy luncheon meat side order) and the wonders of the world will envelope your being in zen-ish fuzziness. Where the world is a better place filled with laughter and slightly slurring exchanges of drunken wisdom from all and sundry who have more than 4 mugs of golden goodness.


sclim said...

hahaha! Nectar of Gods - Ice Cold Heineken. You really should sell this marketing idea to Heineken! Do a commercial showing man in pain and perfectly cured the next moment after drinking the drink of Gods. Probably best with the Vikings theme, goes well with the image (we need it). and an small tiny asterisk that says MRI is probably more sensible than this :P

Chindiana said...

Hmm... sounds feasible. The MRI would be a good clincher...

ghoul said...

I met up with 3 friends on friday and we finished 4 bottles of berringer white zinfandel. Don't think it would have been much fun with Heineken :P

word verification: substo

Chindiana said...

4 bottles some more? oooo.... The undead moving up in the world I see. Nice!