Friday, October 24, 2008


"Hello, Streamyx? My line is down."

" OK, Can I verify your details? Father - Chindiana Sr, mother - Mother Theresa, phone number 1800-333-888?


"What's the problem sir?"

"Can't log on and DSL light is off"

"You off and on the modem?


"Your phone line working ?


"You go accessories, type config/all. what does it say?

" Still says no connection boss."

" take the modem wire, the connection to computer you put to modem and the modem side you put to the computer."

"Eh?? Switch the sides? What the.....??? Ok, ok ..... ..........Um, same thing boss. Could it be a problem with my modem?"

"No sir, from here it is OK. Ok now you stand on one foot, put the computer on your head, then you take the phone line and put in your ear and the modem you connect to your backside. OK, now you face South West and you jump 5 times! Jump faster! higher better also! How? HOW??? Your DSL light coming on or not?????? Got?"

"huffff... man, no DSL light.... I'm starting to see stars though......"

"Ooooohhhhh, you using Microsoft Vista issit?"

So after i run a marathon naked with my laptop strapped to my ass and my modem under one armpit, after I light a bonfire and sacrifice a virgin goat to the Gods of Internet Connectivity, they tell me the famous "OK we have to open a report..."

"But what's the problem boss? This happens almost every month."

"Oh yes but today heavy rain so our lines probably down. Now many people also calling. Same problem as you."


Huh???? DUDE, you should have told me before you asked to me shave off my pubes and stick them on my eyebrows.....

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